A Course In Miracles identifies that there are only two ways to live:

We are either living in Love or

We are living in Fear

Through my journey in life, I spent years and years living a majority of my life in FEAR.  The fear of failure.  The fear of letting other people down.  The fear of not being good enough.  The fear of the mysterious “what If.”  I would spend my days playing out scenarios in my mind of what could happen with a strong belief of what was most likely going to happen.

After my brush with death due to my severe depression, resulting from a life lived in fear, I found A Course in Miracles.   When I started to read and believe, I realized that there was an alternative to fear.

I could live in Love.

I could live in hope.

I could live in empathy.

I could live in forgiveness.

I could live in all of the different thoughts and emotions that create this belief of “Love.”

 

A course preaches that fear is just an illusion and when we are living in this place we are not in reality.   When we are living in love, it is our only truth.  There was a moment along my journey, when I was listening to Marianne Williamson speak that I finally said “enough.  I can see things differently.”

I started forward on this path of faith and hope that I can change.  I can shift my mindset, beliefs, and emotions to live more in love.  What I learned through this spiritual shift is that “it is a lot easier said then done.”

“If Fear is not real, why does it feel so real?”

“Knowing that these fearful thoughts don’t serve me, why do I continue to live in them and make decisions from them?”

These questions would ring in my ear, creating more fear, that I was not going to break this cycle that has haunted me most of my life.  As I entered the world of self development, personal development, and life coaching; I found that I was not alone.  I realized that while fear is just an illusion, these illusions can feel very very real and every single person I have coached battles fear to some degree.

Through my coaching the topic of courage and overcoming fear is intertwined in nearly every conversation:

During these conversations it has been apparent that courage is one of the most important habits to master if we are going to reach our goals, realize our dreams, and live this life with purpose.  I don’t believe fear will go away, it has been ingrained in us through childhood and life experiences, but I do believe that we can master the ability to work through fear with courage and spend more of our life in Love.

Through my training and experience I have developed a formula that I believe can be utilized when we are aware and conscious that fear is controlling our thoughts, emotions, and actions.

The Courage Formula:  C²    X     B.A.

(Clarity – Clarity times Bold Action)

Whenever we feel fear creeping in, when we feel like we are living in fear, or when we reflect on our day/actions and realize that we lived through fear; it is vital to follow this formula to take a deep dive internally and create a new action that serves our purpose.

Let’s Break it down:

Step 1: Clarity

When ever we feel like fear is in our life, the first step is to gain clarity on:

“What is this fear?”

“Why am I feeling this fear?”

“Is this fear real?”

 

When we acknowledge that the fear is present, the most productive step we can take is to first identify why it is there.

A great example of this was when I was struggling with depression, but yet I refused to seek professional help.   I was not taking an action that would be helpful for me, because I was fearful that I would be judged.  “What if people knew I needed to seek help? What if people knew that I was seeing a counselor?   Would they then think that I was broken?  Would they think that I was not inspiring anymore?  Would they think less of me?”

Using this formula: I would have broken down the fear.

Q: “Why won’t I take an action that would help me?”

A: “Because I am fearful of being judged and letting people down.”

Q: “Is this fear real?”

A:  “No, these What If’s situations have not happened and most likely they won’t.  If they do happen, then these are the people that don’t really love me anyway, so who cares.”

Gaining this type of clarity can be empowering.  We are actually gaining data to why we are feeling a certain way and how this fear is really just an illusion.

Step 2: Clarity

Once we have gained clarity on the fear, the second step is to gain clarity on the consequence.

“What will happen if I allow this fear to win?”

 

This question can be scary, but it also can be extremely empowering and create a tremendous amount of necessity to take action to do something different.  When we realize how fear is stopping us from getting something we need or want, it can drive a lot of emotions that thus create the need for action, even if it is scary.

Example:

Q: “What am I losing out on because I won’t seek help?”

A: “I am not getting healthy, I will stay depressed.

A: If I stay this way, my goal of helping others and building a successful business will never come to fruition.

A: Even scarier, if I don’t seek help, I might lose my life (I was close).”

Tip: I think it is vital to dig deep on this one.  It can be scary to really look inside our self and have some realizations, but often the deeper we dig the more likely we will have a breakthrough.  Ask your self the question and continue to ask your self this question, until you answer it in a way that creates an extreme emotion (lights a fire).

Step 3: Bold Action

After we have gained clarity on the why and clarity on the consequence, it is time to take action.  You can have all of the clarity that you want, but nothing will change if you don’t take that bold action.  The whole point of gaining clarity is to create the necessity and the vision that something needs to change, something needs to be done.

Since I have overcome my depression, I have a motto in my life that I live by:

“What are you going to do about it?”

Something didn’t go the way I wanted, “what am I going to do about it?”  I want something to happen in my life “what am I going to do about it?” I challenge you to find our own motto that will trigger you to take bold action, because life is all about action.  You can say the right thing and have the right feelings, but if it doesn’t translate into action, we will stay stuck.  When we are fighting fear, we can realize the fear and realize the consequence, but again at the end of the day we have to take action.

Example:

Q: “What bold action am I going to take to overcome my depression.”

A: I am going to go see a counselor.

A: Even more bold, I am going to write a blog telling people.

A: Even more bold, i am going to share my story on social media.

A: Even more bold, I am going to write a book and do a documentary about me overcoming depression.

Damn:  As soon as I go bolder and bolder,  I feel so empowered.  I feel energized.  I feel excited. I feel ready to take on the world.

Tip: Don’t be scared to be bold. The more bold action we take, the more we realize the fear was not real, the more we learn and grow and live into our purpose.

So when fear comes out way, use this formula to work through the fear, live in love, and move forward with purpose.